Since 6th grade, I’ve been obsessed with productivity planners. Not the casual kind of obsessed though—oh no, I was all in. I was convinced that if I just filled in every minute of every day like a fun game—bing bing bing—I would be the most productive, holiest, perfectly balanced human on the planet. Each year, around Christmas, I’d get really giddy for my new planner. January 1st was always a fresh start and I’d map out my life with military precision: 5:30 AM Pray Rosary. 6:00 AM Brush teeth, get dressed, warm up voice, practice piano, stretch hands. 6:50 AM – Gym, breakfast, meal prep, journal, songwrite, pray, solve world hunger before lunch.
I truly believed that if I stuck to this schedule, I would have life figured out. I would be more organized, in control, and above all- closer to God. But inevitably, reality would set in. Life never unfolded as neatly as my planner. And that’s when the cracks started to show. At first, it’s always a little thing— “Oh, I’m too tired to pray right now.” or “I’ll skip reading the Bible today.” But soon, the little excuses snowball into more. “Why am I losing my spark? Why do I feel so distant from God? Am I sinning more?! Maybe I’ve idolized my career… Or my gym time… Or, dare I say, the guy I’m dating or have a crush on.”
But I’ve been missing the point entirely. It’s not about being busy—it’s that I was focusing on doing rather than being. I had become so fixated on checking off boxes and filling every minute that I had lost sight of why I was doing it all.
Whenever I got busy, I had a bad habit of pushing God out of my schedule. But the truth is, that’s when I needed Him most. I needed to invite Him in even more. So, it took me awhile, but now it’s hit me that I’ve had it all backwards. I need to build my day around the Lord.
In those hectic seasons, my prayer time shouldn’t just stay the same—it should double. Because, as everyone knows, more prayer equals more strength. And yes, that prayer should always be in front of the Blessed Sacrament whenever possible. My pastor has always said to me, “Go to the church anytime in the day, sit in the pew, pray in front of Jesus in the Eucharist. Every day.” And guess what? I actually need to do that. And when I need it the most, I actually want it.
But let’s be real: some days, some days when I’m feeling desolation, I might not have as strong of motivation to pray at all. If I’m struggling to find the desire to pray the Our Father, for example, that’s perhaps a sign I need to slow down and reflect a bit deeper. Instead of rushing through it, I should spend more time meditating on the words, doing a little more research on the power of that prayer, and remembering what it actually means.
This week, I’m juggling Christmas shows, cantoring for Masses at church, and other things. But in this busy season, I’m making a commitment to double my usual prayer time. I’ve carved out two hours of silence just for today—one hour in the morning at church and one in the evening at home. And during that time- just me and Jesus. No agenda. Just soaking up the peace and grace I’ve been too distracted to notice.
Prayer time is no longer a bonus in my planner—it’s the secret ingredient that makes everything else come together. The more I make space for God, the more my life flows with a sense of peace and balance I never knew I needed. The irony is, when I make room for Jesus, my life feels even more productive. But it’s a different kind of productivity—it’s all rooted in peace, not pressure.
If your life starts to feel like it’s spinning out of control, don’t tell yourself, “I can’t pray today.” Say, “Okay, Lord, I’m going to double that prayer time. I’m going to make space for You.” And when you do, He will make space for you also. Trust me—it is the best kind of productivity boost you could ever receive.
Merry Christmas!!! ❤️
